Fischer: When in doubt, leave it out | Lifestyle – Standard-Examiner

In first grade, my diminutive and adorable teacher, Mrs. Eyre, introduced us to punctuation. Before this, every story was one long, emotionless, run-on sentence. I was so excited to use these tiny fetus-like marks that I voluntarily wrote an entire page of story describing my summer and added a comma to the end of each word. I eagerly gave it to my teacher so that she would know that I had fully grasped this new concept. Within minutes she had given it back with the following written in red ink at the top of the page; The comma rule: When in doubt, leave it out! That day, I learned a great lesson; the comma is fun, but an exclamation point, now that is something!

Frankly, these six words; when in doubt, throw it out, have become a lifetime mantra for me and one I share frequently with clients. In fact, just yesterday I had a client text me about a small dining room table. We are getting his home ready to put on the market and he asked if he should keep the table for the purpose of staging. Knowing that his kitchen has approximately enough room for perhaps one 6-year-old, but certainly not two, to turn around in, I recited my mantra. He took my advice. The room appears larger now than it did.

Realizing that this is not the first time I have preached on this subject, nor will it be the last, Im going to say it anyway. Here it is in a nutshell; throw out the clutter. Your children dont want to do it after youre gone. Just get rid of it now. They will be so happy.

More specifically, there are a number of things you can do to stage your home to sell. The most important of which is, take your Realtors advice. Most experienced professionals have seen enough homes that we develop an eye for the Feng Shui. Those of us who do not seem to have a propensity toward ever developing that eye (namely, myself), have a home stager on their team to refer to. That being said, I feel compelled to review some basics.

1) The front lawn is not a driveway, nor a mechanics garage.

2) English Ivy, the beautiful vivacious tendrilled plant, should not be cultivated near an exterior wall. It will soon become an interior plant as it seeps into the brick or concrete and tends to pull it apart at the seams. Also, it is unsightly when dormant.

3) Sheets are not curtains.

4) Hello Kitty is not a decorating theme, nor are puzzles, flags or swimsuit editions of Sports Illustrated.

5) Your living room carpet is not a litter box. Please provide one for your cats. As a side note, the dog should be using the outside facilities, since I have yet to see one use the ones inside.

6) Speaking of animals, your dead, stuffed ones should not be staring at myself or any potential buyer as we walk in the door. Its creepy and distracting.

7) Please, for the love of everything that is holy, do not paint your home (interior or exterior) the most discounted color at the home improvement store. Its discounted for a reason.

8) Let the sunshine in. If it feels like a dungeon, nobody is going to pay money to willingly stay there.

9) Dont paint a blue Y on the roof of your home. Not only is the proper letter U, but not everyone concedes that it holds meaning as anything other than a letter in which Sesame Street is brought to you by.

This list is clearly not all inclusive. However, it can go a very long way in getting a home ready to market and sell for the most money in the least amount of time. Meantime, its only $5.00 to take a load to the dump. Too many commas can become very distracting very quickly and then all meaning is lost.

Jen Fischer is an associate broker and Realtor. She can be reached at 801-645-2134 or jen@jen-fischer.com.

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Fischer: When in doubt, leave it out | Lifestyle - Standard-Examiner